Jan 22, 2009

Visas, Bertha and the Great I AM...

Tonight I am going back to the States to renew my visa. I have been a little panicy that 1/3 of my time here had already past...but then Wendy reminded me that were are leaving early. Whew! It is funny...I don't even want to think about leaving. I am not ready yet...and that is a good thing, because I do have 7 1/2 months left. haha

I have a tendancy to work too hard, mainly because I love work. I love investing my time and energy into something that I know God is investing in. I can't wait for the teams to start coming. I can't wait to see people living in the dorm. I can't wait to see the hospital opened and the recovery wing built. I have caught the vision of this place, and I can see it!

I see the patients coming. I see the teams coming. I see this place being changed...one person at a time.

And it is hard to leave all of this. Even for a week, knowing that I will be back. But God is so good. He is constantly reminding me that I can't do it all...He is the great I AM...not me. This time He chose to physically remove me from the situation. I can't do anything, except to rest in Him. I have to trust in His timing. I have to leave it in His hands.

God is sending people, resources, equipment, you name it...He is lining it up. I have never been a part of something like this before. So I am having to rely on him more. I have to trust in him more.

Earlier this week, my computer crashed. Yes, Bertha, my 6 year old laptop was dead. Along with all of my work for the past 2 1/2 months. Calendars, notes, contacts, videos, menus, schedules, lists, needs, wants, documents, ministry guides, pictures...everything was gone. It was all I could do not to panic. Wendy and I were trying to comfort each other, knowing that we could not possibly do all of that work again before the groups arrived.

I went home and got in my bed. I read my bible and journaled. I gave it all up. I didn't want to have to buy another computer (I really don't like spending money) but I knew that I had to have one. I knew that God would take care of me. I didn't feel like He would let all of that time go to waste. Then I went to sleep.

The next day, Chris the computer guy came back from vacation and passed by on his way to work at the school across the street. He took Bertha with him to work to see if there was anything he could do...and guess what?! Bertha is back!!!

God is so good! He is the great I AM. I don't care what anyone says... God knows every detail in our lives and not only that...he cares about them. So Bertha is back from the dead and she has since been backed up on our external hard drive...just in case!

I am so grateful to know Him. I am so thankful that He is real. I just love Him so much and I want to serve Him for the rest of my life.

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