Sep 4, 2009

Not Sure What to Call This Blog...

I have this overwhelming need to blog right now, but there are so many things bouncing around in my head and my heart that I don't even know where to start. I don't know which one to grab on to and lay out for you. I don't know which ones will take us down the road of self discovery only to end at the brick wall of a back alley.

I do not feel confused. Emotional, yes...but not confused. I know where I am going and that is so comforting. I have a vision and a plan...and normally those two things would energize me and fuel my desire to move forward toward the horizon, but today...I am paralyzed.

I feel as if I am standing on a road and when I look in one direction I see memories dancing in front of me. They remind me of the past 10 months and how sweet they were. In the other direction I see great responsibility and even a little bit of uncertainty.

I have a burden for the people of Honduras and a call to serve them. I know that God will provide for me. I know that he will carry me. Sometimes I have to fight the urge to stomp my feet and cry like a little girl...sometimes I don't want to grow up, and I want someone else to make the decisions for me.

But these are the stretching times...these are the growing pains that will take me from one level to the next. Honestly...this hurts a little. My heart is being pulled...I have to leave things undone and projects unfinished...which means I have to trust God for bigger and bigger things.

So here's to trusting in a trustworthy God. Even though I am faced with uncertainty, I will trust Him. Even though I am scared, I will trust Him. I will call Him: Rescuer, Redeemer and Friend.

Yo lo conozco el como Consuelo, Proveedor y Salvador.

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